Finish this…

While walking down a busy New York City street, my friend Katie and I over heard a guy say to the girl he was with, “Just so you know, me being friends with you...” We didn’t catch the end of the sentence, but it did prompt a whole new game! What could he have possibly ended that sentence with?

“Just so you know, me being friends with you...is only a temporary thing.”
“Just so you know, me being friends with you...really boosts my ego.”
“Just so you know, me being friends with you...is my way of doing community service.”

The possibilities are endless! So I urge you: listen in on the conversations of passers-by—it can provide endless amounts of fun…and it’s free!

Under the Sea

If I were going to one of the most glamorous event of the year...
I would definitely make sure my dress had gills.

It’s Okay To Laugh

While riding the Metro the other day, I almost fell over leaning against one of the metal poles. Fortunately, and awkwardly, I caught my balance, then looked across to the seat facing me to see a guy smiling and looking down. I wanted to go up to him and say, “I know that was hilarious right?”

Here’s the thing, unless someone is visibly hurt from tripping or falling…laugh! Tripping and falling are funny because it is a moment completely void of composure. Picture Barack Obama tripping—you can’t help but laugh!

So I say if you’re the one falling, Ham it up! Be dramatic! People are watching. And if you’re the one watching it’s okay to laugh out loud. Chances are karma will have you tripping soon after.

Be Mine...Um, No Thanks

Nothing says "I love you" better than cheep chalk tasting candy hearts. Ah, tis’ the season.

Favorite Candy Heart Sayings:
CALL ME – um, how about Facebook you? That’s easier.
HOW NICE – who is writing this? Our moms? “How nice dear, now go wash up for dinner.”
BE GOOD – that’s no fun.
LOVER BOY – are we remaking that scene from Dirty Dancing and you forget to tell me?
E MAIL – who?
CALL HOME – I think you’re mother is trying to tell you something.
MARRY ME – too risky man, what if she eats it before reading it?
FAX ME – um, 1995 called and they want their electronics back.
GET REAL – If I were getting rejected I would definitely want it to be on a piece of candy.

Getting Schmeared.

Bagels are a complicated species. I say complicated because they suffer from an identity crisis, identifying themselves with both breakfast and lunch, or brunch. They can’t just choose, it’s too hard. Then there is the breakdown of each type of bagel and what its purpose in life is.

First you have the plain bagel, or what I like to call “the clutch bagel.” You can depend on this bagel and it won’t let you down. It goes with anything you put on it: cream cheese, jelly, butter, lunch meats, egg, tomato, etc. It doesn’t know the word discrimination.

Then you have the Onion bagel. Popular, but not everyone's favorite. You have to be careful though because if rejected it gets very emotional and has a tendency to feel like a poor little lump of dough. It will probably sit in a corner somewhere crying as much as the person who peeled the onions it wears.

Then you have the pumpernickel. This is a very specific type of bagel. It does not have a large fan base, but its fans are dedicated. Mainly sticking to the cream cheeses and lunch meats, this bagel should not venture into the world of sweeter schmears, but it’s okay with that.

Speaking of sweet, this brings us to the cinnamon raisin bagel. With the sweet raisins and cinnamon aroma this just screams, “I’m happy!” How could you ever be mad at bagel like that? (on the other hand if you are actually mad at a bagel there might be underlying issues that need to be addressed).

Lastly, you have the everything bagel. One word: overachiever.