Hope For Haiti

I watched the telethon in tears. These were just some for the reasons. (If you've seen these before, it's doesn't hurt to watch again...and then donate: http://www.hopeforhaitinow.org)

Alternative Library

Dear Magazines,

Oh how I love thee. Making the clock move ever so swiftly while I’m gasping for breath at the fitness center emporium. However, with a lack of employment and finances, life is forcing me to banish you out of my life!…at least, it’s trying to.

But, ha! I am too clever for it’s evil ways and have discovered a delightful way around this banishment. The fitness center emporium! Yes indeed, the emporium boards a myriad of magazines upon its shelves! What delight! Taking one…two…or three home at one time goes unnoticed ; )

I, of course, will return you to your rightful home once I have gazed at your beautiful pages. Soaking up all your knowledge of the past and future months. For this will be our little secret.

Ever Yours,

McKenzie

Be Careful What You Wish For

In this delightful economy I’ve had to apply to a few jobs…and by a few I mean a crazy ridiculous amount. Having to rewrite my cover letter so many times not only becomes tedious, but it’s starting to sound androgynous and boring.

That’s why yesterday I said, “I hope in the future we’ll just be able to record a video message for jobs instead of sending a letter. That way they can see how excited and passionate you are for the position.”

Sure enough, as soon as I said those words my friend Katie sent me a job posting that wanted exactly that…a video resume. Finally, a chance to shine!

What I did not consider was how it would actually look and sound to record your resume. Cut to: Jack Donaghy filming a product integration video for GE.

Jack Donaghy - Product Integration

Call Me Orlando | MySpace Video

In short, it wasn't pretty. Maybe it’s a good thing I'm sticking to paper.

Getting Carded

This is going to be a good year I can feel it! One reason is because last week I had my Tarot Cards read. Stop…I know what your thinking. I’m handing my money away to some stranger who will tell me good things so I will pay her more money. Nope, not the case.

There was no Voodoo-like art up, candles, or incense. No smoke and mirrors. In fact, it was just a blank white room, with a table and chair, in an office building/healing center. My reader was wonderful, and frank, and I loved her.

I won’t get into the details of the whole reading because there was a lot. However, my favorite part: at one point she actually said, “You're being a bitch to your soul. You need to stop whining and listen to her, she knows what’s up.”

So that is my new years resolution for 2010: stop being a bitch and trust my gut. We’ll see what happens!

**My Tarot Card reader looked nothing like the creepy woman in the picture

The Viewing Of This Movie Is PG-13

What! Oh my gosh! Ahhh! So sweet!!

Hi, my name is McKenzie, and I’m a reactor.

I've decided that the next time I go see a movie, regardless of the rating, I am going stand up and issue a caution. I feel it is everyone’s right to know that I will be “that girl.” Yes, it’s true. I gasp, I sigh, I scream. I am what you would call “a reactor”. Whatever emotion the movie is trying to ignite inside its audience members, I am probably feeling. And I will make it known.

Here’s my defense: I can’t control it. I love movies. I love everything about them. I succumb to the "willing suspension of disbelief.” I invest. When I start watching a movie in a theater, my other senses subside and I get tunnel vision. I cannot vouch for my behavior once the previews begin.

And truthfully, at $12 a ticket, why not invest?

Tis' The Season

When a homeless man rejects your food donation, is it time to reconsider your eating habits?

Today on the subway there was a very large man begging for food or money. I didn’t end up eating the lunch I brought and thought (since I had no cash in my wallet) that giving him my lunch would be the Good Samaritan thing to do…until I actually gave it to him.

I had brought rice cakes and hummus for lunch. I was very excited. I thought it was a good lunch. However, the look on his face was more like, “What the fuck is this? Are you really about to hand me your rice cakes and hummus?”

Yes I was, and yes I did. I’m sorry it wasn’t McDonald’s, which upsets my stomach too much.

Weather Report

I went to school in the south for a reason.

While anticipating my wonderfully exciting first day of work, the morning’s weather report said it was going to be 70 degrees, and I believed it. *I envisioned myself running around the city with a light coat on, chuckling with my fellow cast and crew about the idiosyncrasies of this thing we call life.

I should remind myself that NY is not South Carolina. When the day’s forecast says it’s going to be 70 degrees, that really means it’s going to be 55 and raining, and the light sweater you thought would be fine, is now turning into a wet suit.

*Best read with a British accent